Chinuch RoundTable

Readers submit chinuch questions to a panel of renown educators

This week's question:

As a mehahel's wife, I dread the month of September. Sadly, every year there are parents who don't have a yeshiva for their son.


There are those who are beginners and can't get into the school of their first choice. There are those who cannot return to their yeshiva due to academic or behavioral failures, and there are those who want to change for their own reasons.


I have the honor of being married to a man who feels the hurt of all these parents, yet has to say no again and again.


September coincides with Elul. Saying no to so many tearful fathers and mothers during Elul isn't a good feeling entering Rosh Hashanah.


Many years, my husband says it's time to give it up.


One menahel told me that once he decides that this new child is not good for the class, the decision becomes easy. Do I say yes to one boy and no to the class or yes to the class and no to this boy?


I am sure that every menahel has to struggle with making these or other such decisions that leave people in pain, with tears on their faces. How do we handle the guilt and the fear of hurting people?

For the response, see this week's printed edition.

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